#E42 Live EFT Tapping Session: Overcoming Shame and Empowering Your Journey with Ifalase McGowen

Part 2. In this compelling continuation of our deep dive into healing from trauma, Louise and Ifalase explore how to release the burden of shame using Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT).

Having uncovered the insidious effects of trauma in Part 1, this episode offers a hands-on EFT session guided by Ifalase, allowing listeners to experience the soothing potential of tapping.

With Louise sharing reflective journaling prompts, you’ll delve even deeper into your personal healing journey.

It's time to let go of the past, embrace self-compassion and move forward in a supportive and caring environment.

Find your quiet space, and prepare to transform your emotional landscape.

Don't forget to share this empowering session with someone in need and subscribe for more insights into your healing journey.

Join us as we turn the page on fear and shame.

Released March 12th 2025

Listen Here

Listen on Spotify

Listen On Amazon Music

Listen on Apple Podcast

Listen On Youtube

Our Guest 🫶🏻

Ifalase McGowan has always been fascinated by people—how we think, how we connect and how our experiences shape who we are.

She first explored this curiosity through neuroscience, but over time, she realised her true passion wasn’t just in studying the brain—it was in understanding the human heart.

Now, she spends her time helping others find moments of calm, self-reflection and healing.

With her warm and supportive approach, Ifalase creates spaces where people can slow down, breathe and truly listen to themselves.

Whether she’s guiding a session, sharing her insights, or simply holding space for someone’s journey, she encourages deep self-connection in a way that feels safe, gentle and accessible.

Ifalase believes in the power of pausing, in allowing yourself to rest and in finding comfort in the present moment.

Her work isn’t just about healing—it’s about rediscovering your own inner wisdom, at your own pace, in your own way.

Links

www.ifalasemcgowan.com 

https://www.ifalasemcgowan.com/enhanceyourjoy - 5 Day programme Prep questions

Louise Bryant

⁠⁠⁠Sign Up To The Food & Body Freedom Waiting List⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Our Free Membership ⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Free Reclaiming your Body Visualisation Meditation⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join the 30-Day Sobriety Challenge⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠(was 21 days)

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Share Your Story (anonymously if you wish)⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠For more podcasts secretsinthepowderroom.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow us on Instagram.secretsinthepowderroom⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Work With Me Louise Bryant⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Follow LouiseBryant.Coach on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join The Secrets In The Powder Room Facebook Group⁠⁠⁠⁠

Blog 🚨

Embracing Healing: A Journey Through Trauma, Shame, and Empowerment

Discover the Power of EFT and Self-Compassion in Overcoming Emotional Barriers

Introduction: Unveiling the Power of Conversations on Trauma

In today's world, people often carry the weight of trauma and shame without ever addressing it. This silence can hinder personal growth and impede emotional healing. In a recent episode of the "Secrets in the Powder Room" podcast, hosts Ifalase McGowan and Louise Bryant opened up a dialogue about these emotional burdens and discussed potential paths to healing through Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT).

The Catalyst for Change: A Personal Journey into Psychology

Ifalase McGowan's journey into EFT and coaching began with a curiosity spurred by reality television. A chance conversation about a peculiar tapping technique piqued her interest, leading her to explore EFT further. Through her background in psychology and neuroscience, Ifalase delved into understanding how our developmental years shape our minds and impact our mental health. Her story underscores the importance of being open to new methods of healing, as her exploration of EFT became a central pillar in her coaching practice.

Understanding Trauma: Realizations and Psychological Patterns

Trauma often manifests in complex ways that individuals may not consciously recognise. Ifalase explores the connection between past traumas and current behaviours, shedding light on how our bodies and minds hold onto such experiences. When people experience trauma, it often results in specific patterns and habits aimed at alleviating emotional distress. These can range from substance abuse to seemingly innocuous habits like overeating.

Ifalase highlighted the significance of being aware of one's habits and understanding that they're not inherent flaws but rather coping mechanisms developed over time. Acknowledging these patterns is a vital step towards healing, allowing for a re-evaluation of self-perception and a re-direction of energy towards positive growth.

Shame and Guilt: The Emotional Twins

The dialogue between Ifalase and Louise dives into understanding the subtle yet significant differences between shame and guilt. Brene Brown's insights help clarify these concepts: guilt is recognising a mistake, while shame is internalising that mistake as a reflection of one's identity. Ifalase shares how early traumas can embed these feelings deeply within, influencing one's self-esteem and actions in adulthood.

Addressing and understanding these emotions can liberate individuals from the prison of negative self-perception. It involves rewriting the narrative from one of shame to empowerment, allowing individuals to reclaim their stories and reshape their futures.

EFT: A Pathway to Healing and Self-Compassion

Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT), often known as tapping, offers a unique approach to addressing emotional distress. This practice combines the physical act of tapping on acupressure points with the psychological process of affirming one's emotions. By focusing on feelings of anxiety or shame while tapping, individuals can release pent-up energy and emotions associated with traumatic memories.

Ifalase emphasizes the importance of working with a trained practitioner to ensure a safe and effective healing journey. Trust and safety are paramount, as they provide the foundation necessary for deep emotional work. EFT, when practiced under the guidance of a skilled coach, can significantly reduce stress, alleviate anxiety, and foster self-compassion.

Women and Healing: Overcoming Societal Barriers

In the podcast episode, Ifalase and Louise also touch upon how societal constructs impact women's healing journeys. Growing up with male-centric narratives in media and culture can cause women to perceive themselves as secondary characters in their own lives. This societal bias contributes to feelings of inadequacy and the pressure to overcompensate by taking on extra responsibilities.

Recognising these societal influences is the first step in dismantling the barriers women face in their healing journeys. By embracing self-compassion and prioritising self-care, women can break free from these constraints and step into their power.

Conclusion: The Path Forward

Healing from trauma is not a linear process but a multifaceted journey requiring patience, compassion, and support. Ifalase and Louise's conversation invites listeners to acknowledge their traumas, understand their coping mechanisms, and find pathways like EFT to facilitate healing. By embracing these practices, individuals can transform their narratives and cultivate a deeper sense of self-awareness and empowerment. As the journey towards holistic healing continues, the importance of creating open dialogues around these topics cannot be overstated.

Journaling prompting questions ✍🏻

Here are some journaling questions to help reflect on the themes discussed in this episode of the podcast "Secrets in the Powder Room":

1. How did your own journey with trauma and healing begin, and what has been the most pivotal moment in that journey so far?

2. Have you experienced feelings of shame related to past events or trauma? How have these feelings influenced your behaviour and self-perception?

3. Reflect on a time when you practiced self-compassion. How did it impact your emotional well-being and overall mindset?

4. Are there any healing practices or modalities you are curious about but haven't tried yet? What has drawn you to them?

5. What barriers do you think are most prevalent in your healing journey? How can you begin to break them down?

6. Who in your life provides you with a sense of safety and support? How can they play a role in your healing process?

7. How do you see your journey evolving in the next year? What steps can you take to ensure continued growth and healing?

These questions aim to encourage reflection and self-discovery, drawing directly from the themes of trauma, shame, healing, and self-compassion discussed by Ifalase McGowan and Louise Bryant in the podcast episode.

Transcript 📝

NOTE: This podcast was transcribed by editing tool, Please forgive any typos or errors

Hey. I'm so happy you're joining us for part two of our deep dive into healing from trauma and releasing shame by using EFT with the incredible Ifalase McGowan. If you listen to part one, you'll know we explored some profound insights into trauma and how it affects us and the importance of addressing shame in our healing journey. And if you haven't already checked it out, make sure you do. In this episode, Ifalase is guiding us through a live EFT session where you'll have the opportunity to experience the power of tapping firsthand. It's a chance to release the weight of shame and embrace self compassion in a supportive and nurturing environment. And that's not all. I'll be sharing reflective journaling questions designed to help you dive even deeper. So grab a comfortable spot where you won't be disturbed, and let's get started together. Oh, and don't forget to share this episode with someone who might need it. And as always, subscribe so you never miss a moment of healing wisdom. Okay. Let's get started.

Welcome to the Secrets in the Powder Room, where we share stories and open up conversations about all the secrets women are forced to keep out of fear and shame. I'm Louise Bryant, professional certified coach, intuitive eating counselor, and trauma informed domestic abuse specialist and survivor. We're here to support you on your healing journey and help you feel like you're not alone. This is not spirit replacement of your own professional, medical, or legal advice. This podcast contains adult language and content. Listener discretion is advised.

Okay. Welcome back. So just for those of you who haven't listened to the first part of this podcast, you don't need to go and listen to that before you do this tap in, but I just wanted to remind you that you're in safe hand because Ifalase McGowan helps people break free from debilitating PTSD symptoms that keep them stuck in anxiety, hyper-vigilance, and emotional pain. She's an advanced EFT practitioner and certified coach, and she combines evidence based approaches like psychology, neuroscience, and NLP with gentle movement and mindfulness practices. And through her transformative in person retreats and personalized coaching, clients learn practical tools to find lasting relief from both the mental and the physical impacts of trauma. And today, we are going to be doing a live tapping session, and as you guys know, we've got this podcast and it's about all the secrets we keep out of fear and shame. And, obviously, I'm writing I'm hoping to be writing a book, and I'm collecting stories from lots of women who are telling me their stories that they've been holding on to out of fear and shame. So I'll be doing it right along with you. We'll be tapping along together, so let's get started. So we're gonna do a little bit of EFT now, and I'm gonna ask you, Louise, to be my client for today. And Yes. My pleasure. What we'll do is I will guide you. And for the sake of your fabulous audience, I'll explain things that perhaps I wouldn't do in a usual session. And all you need to do is to find a quiet space, like, where you feel that you're not being listened to, you're not being heard. You can go and sit down, relax, just feel totally comfortable where you're at. So maybe you need to hit pause, maybe you could, find a better time, or if now's the time, brilliant. I would grab a glass of water, make sure you're nice and hydrated, and then we'll get cozy and comfortable. So I'm standing at my desk as I'm doing this. Is this okay to be standing, or should I be sitting? Standing is fine. So if you are in a place where it feels safe, however, maybe someone can see you and you don't want to be physically tapping on your face, you can just imagine that you're tapping. So if you're busy doing something and you'd like to still listen along, you you can just imagine that you're doing the tapping, and that will still have an impact. Okay. So if you take a few deep breaths for me, Louise, just to center yourself, and I'll do that with you as well. And when we tap, we tap on parts of the face and the body that are clusters of nerve endings. When we tap on different parts of our body, it activates our parasympathetic nervous system. So that's our soothed system. It's our cyst a whole part of our, nervous system that calms us down. And then we add in language from something that may be a little bit more aggravated or from the past. And when we combine those two things together, it soothes the emotion from the past or wherever you maybe from the present, wherever it's coming from. So I'm going to start by tapping on the side of my hand, and I'm gonna invite Louise to copy. So this would be where your little finger is, just on the side of your hand. It's also known as the karate chop point. So if you were to turn into the karate kid, that would be the point. So we're just tapping there and taking a deep breath in. And today, we're just gonna do some tapping on shame. So I'm gonna invite you to notice When you hear the word shame, see if you can identify any shifts or any energy in your body, anything that feels heavy or tight as you repeat the word to yourself. So we'll both do that together now, Louise. So if you say shame inside your head then just see what comes up. What do you notice in your body? And you can stop tapping while you do that if it's helpful. Shame for me is coming up. It's almost it's in the back of my throat, but going up into my head. And what can you feel there? It's attention. It's it's, like, stress. It's actually, like, moving. As we're speaking, it's coming over to the the left side of my face and to my head. It's kind of moving around in the top of my face now. So anyone listening, like, make a note of where that feeling is, where that sensation is for you. And then I'm gonna ask you another question now. So how strong is that feeling? So how strong is that tightness from zero to 10? 10 being painful, zero, it's not there. Yeah. I wouldn't say it's painful, but it's really it's almost that tingling now that I'm noticing it. And so I'd say it's definitely an eight, but not painful, but just really I can really feel it. Okay. So let's say let's say an eight. It's not painful. Can you describe how it does feel? It's tingly. Tingly. Okay. It's tingly. Yeah. It's almost numbing. Okay. So for those of you listening, if you write down or make a note for yourself, what's that number for you? And I'm gonna use the words that Louise has given me. In place of those words, when you repeat after me with Louise, say your feelings, say your number, say your whatever's coming up for you in your body. Does that make sense? It makes sense to me. Yes. Okay. Good. Hopefully, we're getting a resounding yes from everyone. Yes. Definitely. Okay. So we're now going to forget all of that, and I just want you to focus on repeating what I say. However, if what I say isn't quite right, of course, I'm gonna be using Louise's words, just change it to what is coming up for you. Okay? K. So we'll start again by tapping on the side of the hand. And so, Louise, repeat after me. K. Even though Even though. I have this tingling I have this tingling. In the left side of my face In the left side of my face. I soothe and comfort myself I soothe and comfort myself. And I accept that I've got this feeling, and I accept that I've got this feeling. Even though Even though. I have this tingling in the side of my face. I have this feeling tingling in the side of my face. It's a feeling. That's good. I've got a feeling on the side of my face. That's brilliant. Thank you. I acknowledge the feeling. I acknowledge the feeling. And I'm noticing it there. And I'm noticing it there. Brilliant. So we're gonna move to the second point now, which is right on the top of your head. So just tapping anywhere on the top of your head. That's lovely. And when we tap, we do we can do that really gently. If it's too intense for you, you can just place your hand on the point. And if it's too much, just move to the next point. So we'll tap on the top of the head and repeat this tingling. This tingling. And then we go to the inside of the eyebrows. So you can either tap on both or just on one and repeat again, this tingling in my face. This tingling in my face. And then we move round the bone of the eye to the side of where your temples are. Brilliant. So just tapping gently there. All this tingling in my face All this tingling in my face. Where I've been holding my shame. Where I've been holding my shame. Beautiful. K. So take a deep breath in. Really feel into that tingling. So focus on being inside your body. If you can, just keep your eyes open just a tiny bit, maybe gazing down if it's easier, and just noticing what's coming up in your body. Noticing the tingling. Maybe it shifted slightly. Maybe you're noticing something up else coming up. Just keep tapping and noticing what's going on when you hear the word shame. And maybe the word's even hard to say to yourself, and that's okay. Getting a deep breath now, breathing all the way out. Come down to underneath your eyes, and we'll tap there. All this tingling. It's tingling. And then underneath your nose, between your nose and your mouth, all this tingling All this tingling. I've kept in my body. I've kept in my body. Brilliant. And then underneath your mouth, we're just gonna say shame. Shame. When we hear that word, like, for me, it really comes up with, like, how many women have been shamed in their lives? Wow. Yeah. And maybe we'll just tap to acknowledge how many women have been shamed for all kinds of things. And then let's come to the collarbone point. So where your collarbone is, just go one inch below where it gets soft so you're not on the bone. You're just slightly yeah. And you kinda come inwards a little bit. So yeah. That's brilliant. That's it. So just taking in, like, how many women have been shamed? Like, the witch trials. That's hundreds of years of women not being okay to be women. If you think about today, like, are we fully accepted for who we are? Or are we having to mask ourselves? All of that is shame. Just repeating the word again, shame. Shame. And noticing what's your physical response. It's not just a word, is it? It has so much meaning to it. Yeah. Meaning to you, to me, to women everywhere, to people everywhere. So coming underneath your arm now, let's go to the next point. Now this is where underneath your arm, if you hold your arm in the air, it would be where your lower part of your bra strap would be. I stopped wearing bras ages ago, but can you imagine where that is for you? That's brilliant. So we're looking a bit like monkeys now. That's good. And then just saying shame and taking a deep breath in. Shame. And then breathing all the way out. And then the last point, and this one doesn't often get mentioned, but if you're tapping on yourself, come down to your ribs, just underneath the bust. And anywhere on the ribs or even on the stomach, just gently tapping. This is the point where we usually store a lot of emotion. So you might notice some physical sensations when you tap here. It's a good one to tap. Sorry? You haven't got a bra on or you've got big boobs. You might not be able to do this. Yes. So it that's a really good point. So if you can't, then you can either go lower on the stomach and just tap on the stomach, and we're still activating those lines. And if not, just come to the top of your head. That's good. I'm out there. Might be happy looking like you. Okay. So if you relax your hands now and take a deep breath in through the belly, expand the ribs, expand the upper chest, breathe that air all the way out. Again, I'm gonna repeat the word. Perhaps you can repeat it to yourself. Shame. Shame. What do you notice this time? Notice the feelings there, but it feels lighter. It's almost moved to my ear now, and it's just tingling's reduced. Mhmm. Yeah. Almost a ringing in my ear. Okay. So we would say in EFT that that's it moving, which is good. It's traveling. So we'll we'll we'll chase with it and see where it goes. So from a scale of zero to 10, what would be the intensity of the ringing now for you, Louise? At five. Okay. So anyone listening along, make a note of what your new sensation is. Has it gone up? Has it gone down? If it's gone up, perhaps we've we've found a jack in the box. And in that case, I would, like, bring the language back a little bit. So just for safety of everyone, I'll do that for this just in case anyone's number's gone up. And then, you would say it's a a ringing in your ears. Is there a color to the ringing? Just give me your first answer. It would be a navy blue. Navy blue. Brilliant. Thank you. So we're working with the subconscious now, which is great because that's the part of us that has a lot of control. So we'll go back to tapping on the side of your hand, and taking another deep breath and releasing all the way out. Even though Even though. There's this shame in my ear. There's this shame in my ear. It's lingering there. Oh, it's lingering there. I soothe and comfort myself. I soothe and comfort myself. Even though. Even though. The shame is still there. The shame is still there. And now it feels like a five. And now it feels like a five. And it's a navy blue. And it's a navy blue. I soothe and comfort myself. I soothe and comfort myself. Take a deep breath in and release. And which ear is it, Louise? It's my left ear. Yeah. Thank you. Okay. So even though Even though. I have this ringing in my left ear I have this ringing in my left ear. Which is my feminine side. Which is my feminine side. I soothe and comfort myself. I soothe and comfort myself. Because it's your ear or depending on the part of your body, it might have a link to how you've received that shame. So the left side of your body, the feminine side of your body is traditionally how you receive. And then if you think about yin and yang balance, so yin is the receiving, the feminine receptive. Yang is the masculine putting things out there. Because it's your feminine, it might be that it's it could be because we're talking about women. It might be that maybe someone said something to you that made you feel shame because it's gone into your ear, or maybe there's, like, an inner voice of stuff coming up that because it's your ear, that might be related as well. That doesn't need to be in this. I'm No. No. I don't mind. I hold my shame on you know? Just tell the world. It's definitely definitely stuff around. My shame definitely comes from stuff that's been said to me, done to me. You know, everyone who listens to the podcast knows there's domestic abuse, sexual assault. It's like it's yeah. It's definitely all that stuff to ask women. Yeah. Yeah. Definitely. Okay. But, yeah, makes total sense. And how do you feel right now while you're tapping? Are you okay? Like Yeah. I'm good. Mhmm. I know I'm in safe hands. Good. I feel safe. I feel held. Good. Okay. That's exactly what we want, so thank you, Louise. The color navy blue that you gave me, let's just focus on the navy blue. And I'd like you to imagine that you're putting that color, the ringing, and throw it out in front of you. Like, take it out of your ear and imagine with your mind that you're putting it in front of you so you can see it right there. So instead of being hidden in your ear, let's put it out in front of you. And you can make it small if you want. You don't have to make it really big. Make it nice and small. And just tell me what you see when you're looking at it. A square box. Am I still tapping? Yeah. Please keep tapping. Keep tapping. I see a square box in the distance, and it's relatively small. It's not tiny, but it's not it's not huge. It's a small navy box way ahead of me. Okay. More navy box. How's the box make you feel? It makes me feel a bit angry and sad, and it's like there's something in that box that doesn't wanna be in it. Okay. So let's just tap on what's coming up for you, if that's okay. So even though Even though. I have this box I have this box. In front of me In front of me. And it's making me feel a bit angry and sad. And it's making me feel a bit angry and sad. I soothe and comfort myself. I soothe and comfort myself. Even though Even though. It's got something in it that doesn't wanna be in there. It's got something in it that doesn't wanna be in there. I acknowledge I acknowledge. That there's something inside of the box. There's something inside of the box. Even though Even though? Something inside that box. There's something inside that box. What's coming up for you as we as we said? I now can see me as a young girl. I'm now on top of the box. Mhmm. And I'm almost I'm angry. I'm behaving like an angry I wanna say spoiled child. That's the wrong word. So that's kind of my I'm kind of you know, it's for a visual, a child that's just playing up and just stamping on the box, angry, and showing her feelings in a way that's almost out of control, from an adult looking at looking on Yeah. Not knowing what's going on for that young child Okay. Version of me. Alright. Thank you. I didn't mean to go this far, but Thank you. We're going deep. Very good. Go for it. I want you to tap as if you're speaking for her. So you've got this angry version of Louise on that box, and we're gonna tap through the points. So come to your top of your head, and I want you to talk as if you're her. So I will I'm so angry. Yeah. Good. Good. Keep going. I'm so angry. This just isn't fair. This isn't fair. This isn't my fault. I'm so angry. I know now this isn't my fault. I'm so angry, and that's all I can say is I'm so angry. Really am. I'm so angry, and I just know that this isn't my fault. This this shouldn't I shouldn't have had to hold on to this for so long. It's not my fault. I'm so angry. That's beautiful. And as you look at her now, what what's she doing? She's crossing her arms. She's stamping her feet. She might have some more today. Let's go let's go to the let's tap through the points. So we'll go to the inner part of the eyebrow. And if anyone else is, you know, feeling that the shame's bringing up anger, it's bringing up perhaps a part of us that hasn't come up before, let's just say what comes up for you as Louise shares what comes up for her. So just tapping, and we'll all instruct us to go through the points, but just saying whatever's coming up for you. So, Louise, over to you, and we'll go through the points. What does she wanna do? It's not my fault. It's their fault. They shouldn't have made me feel like this. They shouldn't have done that. And I've held on to this for so many years, and I felt ashamed about it and embarrassed Like, it was my fault. Comes in the Soviet. So try to imagine you're just the little girl going into the story, but just like, what would she say? There's no one to talk to. I have to deal with this by myself. If I tell anybody, they're gonna blame me, and it'll be my fault because I let it happen. I'm so hurt. I don't know who to trust, and maybe I should just forget that it ever happened. Thank you. And can you see the the inner part of us, that younger self, has kind of formed a strategy? It said, I can't tell anyone, and it's made up a reason. And that's fine because that's what we do when we're kids. We don't know. We just don't know. So just being able to speak that out as her truth at the time, she felt like she couldn't say anything. Let's just let that be okay. So we've moved to underneath the eye. Come underneath the nose now. Just say I couldn't I couldn't speak up. I couldn't speak up. Underneath the mouth, it wasn't safe. It wasn't safe. And the collarbone, there was no one I could talk to. There was no one I could talk to. Underneath the arm? Because if I did, I'd get in trouble. Because if I did, I'd get in trouble. And I didn't wanna get in trouble. No. I didn't wanna get in trouble. To your ribs if you can or if you just go to your hands. I didn't wanna get in trouble. I didn't wanna get in trouble. Top of the head, so I stay quiet. So I stay quiet. And then go to your eyebrow. It's safe to stay quiet. It's safe to stay quiet. Side of the eye, it's safe to stay quiet. It's safe to stay quiet. Underneath the eye, it feels safer to keep my mouth shut. It feels safer to keep my mouth shut. I'm so angry underneath your nose. So angry. I'm so angry. Is she still angry? What's coming up for her now, Louise? I feel she's just understanding. She I can feel there. I'm there with her just in that moment of knowing that that's what me speaking as her, this is what I need to do to survive. We would both get in trouble if I said anything, and it's it's the safest thing to do, in this moment. And it's the right thing to do in this moment. Thank you. So as you look at her on top of the box now, Louise, can you tell me what you see? She's now sitting on the box feeling defeated. What does she need? Do you wanna ask her? She needs a hug. K. Who does she wanna hug from? Me? Yeah. K. So in your mind's eye, ask her how she would feel if you gave her a hug. A crime. Feel safe with me. Yeah. Just take a deep breath. And this can happen when we're doing a bit of tapping and releasing. So that stored up feeling. Are you feeling okay? Yeah. No. All good. That's Yeah. Good cycle. Feel held. Let's just come back. Come to the side of your hand and just take a deep breath, and just allow her to receive that hug. Look. I need one from her too now. Why don't we reciprocate? Ask her if you could get a hug. I don't have a hug too, Louise. Hug it out. Hug it out. Yeah. Let's hug it out. Yeah. Just keep tapping and hugging. Beautiful. What do you notice, Nana? It's comfort. It's comfort there. Mhmm. You know? It's not only she that needs I, but I that need her. And, you know, we are we were then, and we are now. And, obviously, my more resourceful self is here. And although no one was there, no one's able to be there for me back then, I'm now able to be there for me. That's just tap. And and her for for me. Her for me too. So, yeah, it's it's a special moment. Glad. And you're smiling too for those people who can't see. Yeah. So let's just tap on that. So just on what's coming up for you now, we'll just tap through the points, and I'll just let you guide this. And as I move through, I'll just remind us to move through the points. So the first thing you said was it's a comfort. She has you and you have her. So just anything else that came up for you now. It's not knowing that it's we're safe and that won't happen again. That was then. This is now. I hear you. I see you. I believe you. And no one's gonna get into trouble. Mhmm. I'm just tapping through the points, everyone, as as we just tap in to our nervous system, all of those learnings. Because when we let go of the not let go, but when we ease that strong emotion, which was super strong, that shame is super, super strong, that we get to form a wisdom from it because it's no longer clouding our bodies and our minds. So what wisdom would you take from from that belief? That if you didn't have you know, get me to talk while I'm tapping my mouth. Sorry. That's oh, thanks for moving now to my chin. And if if we didn't have then what we needed or I didn't have then what I needed, but I do have it now in myself and not having to worry about other people around me to give me that because I'm capable to give it to myself. We we can work on this stuff, and it it's safe in the right hands to be able to go there. And I'm safe. Yeah. Beautiful. What three words do you wanna tap into your system now? I am safe. Oh, three words. Three words. Safe, held, heard. Let's tap on that. So top of your head, safe. Safe. Make a deep breath in and release it all out. Come to the eyebrows. Held. Held. Deep breath in and release to the side of your eyes. Head. Head. Take a deep breath in and release. And we'll just give everyone a chance who's listening to tap in their own words. So we'll just go underneath your eyes and just repeat what words came up for you. What are the three things that you wanna tap into your system? Just repeating one after the other as we tap through. So underneath the nose, safe. Safe. Underneath the mouth, held. Held. And the collarbone, set. Heard. Heard. Need to bond to the side of the hand. I feel safe. I feel safe. I feel held. I feel held. I feel heard. I feel heard. Breathe that all in. Deep breath in. Expanding the belly, the ribs, the upper chest, and breathing it all the way out. Relaxing your hands down, and we'll do one last scan of the body. Now when you hear the word shame, see what you notice. Lighter. Hands feel a bit cold. I feel I've let go of something. I like that you say you let go of something because I think whenever we peel off a layer, we never know what the impact's gonna be. So notice your thought patterns or your behaviors as you go out into the world. And we've just done such a short amount of tapping. We, of course, done way more. However, even this will make a difference in in in some ways. So just notice what comes up for you. And if it hasn't, that's all good too. Simply tapping calms us down. So simply tapping calms our nervous systems. Thank you. Thank you so much for doing that. You're welcome. Thank you. Exciting to do. Thank you so much for doing that with me. I feel absolutely privileged to be able to share that with you, and I know this is something that's been coming up a little bit for me in recent times with with with stuff anyway. So this isn't a new experience that's kind of sent me somewhere where it I don't wanna go. But, yes. So if somebody wanted to learn more about EFT and working with you or wanted to connect with you, how would they do that? So I'd love to hear from them. I have my website, which is iflaysmcgowan.com, which I'm sure will link wherever it needs to be linked. Yep. And I've been creating programs for people to be able to tap themselves as well. So you can find all of those details on my website. And I have a newsletter where I love to share tips every week about how you can look after yourself more, be more self compassionate, find ways to rest, to heal just with little tips every Friday. So if you'd like to sign up for that, I'll include that link as well. Fabulous. Well, thank you so much so much for coming and talking to us today. I feel it's an absolute privilege to have you here. So is there any kind of final thoughts or anything else you just wanted to add to the end before we close-up? Love a final thought. Love a final thought so much. I always think of Jerry Springer. He hung on his chair and be like, my thoughts of the day. I think that shame is vast. And, actually, when I was saying it, I thought of Cersei in Game of Thrones and how she had to walk, and then everyone's just gonna shame shame. That came up. And, actually, I just thought Jeremy Clarkson had made a comment in the newspaper that Meghan Markle should do a walk of shame for how she's behaved and you know? Just the fact that it's okay to shame women in the way that we have been. I realized today that, and this doesn't have to go in, but I really realized today that I think the shame is bigger for all of us than just us. So I think as a collective, we're probably holding on to stuff, and it's so important that we all do our own thing to try to get past that, whether it's a healing session or joining a musical dance theater class. Like, whatever it is that you feel makes you feel you is so important, and I think that's truly how we how we heal. Yeah. Awesome. Thank you. Thank you so much for your final thoughts. Thank you. Thank you for coming. Thanks for having me. This is lovely. Yes. It was. It was great to have you.

So just before you disappear, just grab yourself a pen and paper, and we're just gonna go over a few journaling questions just to reflect on what we've learned over these two sessions and how we're feeling.

So let's start by thinking about what emotions came up for you while you were listening to this episode. Just write about anything that stood out or resonated with you.

And how has shame or guilt shown up in your life?

What would it feel like to let go of some of that weight? And when have you felt truly safe and supported?

And how can you create more of that feeling in your daily life?

And what is one small act of self care or self compassion that you can commit to this week?

And lastly, how did the EFT tapping exercise make you feel? And would you try it again? Why? Or why not?

So I hope these journaling questions are helpful, and as always, if you head over to the blog post, I always add more journaling questions to my podcast blog there, so go over and take a look.

So thank you for listening to this episode of the Secrets in the Powdering podcast with me, Louise Bryant, and my wonderful guest, Ifalase . So remember, healing is a journey, and you don't have to do it alone. And if you found this helpful, make sure that you share this episode with a friend who might need it. And if you want more support, don't forget to check the membership community as we dive deeper into healing, boundaries, and self care. All the details are in the show notes. Take care of yourself.